Smells Like Football Games & Bonfires.....

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this time of year.  Always have.  Going to football games and chatting with friends. Drinking a cold beverage with gloves on but yet not too cold that you can't stand it.  The leaves are turning, and it's beautiful out.  These are the days I live for!!  I am feeling so much better from my respiratory problems that it's like a re-birth for me!  So excited to have the weekend in front of me.  I am probably going to make it to that Bacheloretter Party this weekend, although I am packing lots of water....I know, I am a Debbie Downer but I do not want to take ANY chances of a relapse!!!  It will be fun just to socialize.  I remember not too long ago that I just wanted to hide in my house and not see anyone so I feel like it's a big step for me to get out around a huge group of people.  But I am looking forward to it, rather than having panic attacks about it....huge turn-around for me!! 

Mike is busy farming so the kids and I have been hanging out.  Palmer has started to aggrevate Hadley instead of her hanging on his every move...I think he doesn't like that one bit!!  I think it's funny!  They are my entertainment.  My baby turns 2 on Oct 13th......can't believe she is getting to be such a big girl.  Here's a pic of the both of them when Palmer had "nerd day" at school:

Why do I always JINX myself????

Remind me to keep my mouth closed so I don't jinx myself!  I KNOW how super crazy and superstitious I am, so WHY would I say that I am perfectly fine???  Cuz last week I developed nasty sinus infection that moved to my chest and has now given me walking pneumonia.  I feel like A$$.  And it feels like it's never going away.  I can't hardly swallow, eat, sleep or anything because of the congestion in both my chest and nose.  I have not been able to smell anything in 6 days, which is good and bad I guess!!  I have a really good antibiotic though, so hopefully I am on the mend.  I have to miss a super fun bachelorette party this weekend though so I can recuperate and keep on my meds (no partying on those meds!!) and I am really bummed about it.  But I really need to start to feel better.  So Brittany and Brady...have fun at your parties...I really wanted to be there as I know it would have been a blast.  But I will redeem myself at the wedding reception!!!

Appears to be nothing wrong with me....

I am happy to report that other than mental angst, I am perfectly healthy!  I got my stitches out yesterday and the "almost" twins look so nice and are feeling much better.  They are so much smaller!!!  I can't believe what a difference it makes in shirts and sweaters.  But I am very happy with the out-come and feel much more like a "girl" now.  (Not Frankenstein!)

Still waiting for my hair to grow in so I have been wearing berets with a 1/2 wig.   It's kind of a "thing" for me right now. Not quite as hot and a bit more comfy than a full wig.  Plus I look like so Bob Marley-ish.  Mike makes fun of me but that's ok.  Here is my Hawkeye, Bob Marley look:

The new me.....

I got a raving review from my plastic surgeon.... that I am healing nicely and all looks good. The loose skin is a "good thing" as my other boob is normally loose and not saline hard, so he wanted both of them to match as closely as possible.  I will say they are both jiggly and feel pretty real, especially the one that is not real.  At 42 I don't really need my boobs to be at my neckline so I am pretty happy with the results.  They will never look or feel the same as they use to, but I am ok with that cuz I get to see my kids grow up.

Don't take those eyelashes for granted!!!

I am slowly getting back to normal (or what was mostly normal for me).  My eyebrows are coming along beautifully, my hair is coming in nice and thick...still really short and no bangs, but nice and thick.  Also my hair is a nice mouse fur color right now, but I can live with it so far.  My body is healing up from the chemo and now I look like I have a french manicure as all the poison "white" lines in my fingernails have traveled all the way to the tips of my fingernails....it's the strangest thing I have ever seen!  I go see my plastic surgeon today to get the drain out hopefully so I can soon start wearing REAL bras!  I can't wait for that!  But I must say, my poor eyelashes really took a beating.  The bottoms ones are fine...I  never really lost those.  But my top lashes look like someone killed a spider by stepping on it and then harvested the crooked, broken legs of that spider for an eyelash transplant for me.  No matter how I try to curl or apply mascara, those stupid lashes go all over the place and clump together.  It's the ugliest thing I have seen!  And trying to seperate the lashes, only makes them look worse....so for now I will live with the dead spider legs on my eyes.  I will wear falseys now and then but hopefully it gets better soon.  I need my lashes back to normal!

Rougher than I thought.....

I thought I would be down a couple of days healing with my wounds but I was wrong...(I know, mark it on your calendar...Laurie was wrong!)  I was pretty sore and not feeling the greatest even this weekend.  I felt like I had the flu....mixed in with falling down on the highway and getting major road rash on my chest....that is how it feels.  Kinda stingy!  But I have been a major loafer at home and caught up on all my crazy reality shows.....I know, I am a reality junky and I hate it!!!  My guilty pleasure!  But back to work today as I am feeling a lot better.  Thursday I go to the doctor and hopefully get out this DRAIN!!  I know....the dreaded drains...hate them with a passion, but of course everyone knows how much I hate those drains.  But I should be thankful for only having 1 drain this time instead of 2.  And I have been able to be my own nurse-maid and haven't really had to rely on anyone else which is a huge goal of mine.  I am so tired of being the patient!!! 

I must say that the twins are not really twins anymore, but I do like to call them that, they are fraternal twins now though, and not identical!  HA!  They are a nice smaller size and something I think I can work with.  I do have some extra skin on the implant side so I am going to have to ask how that is going to work out.  That extra skin causing chafing...and you know I can't stand chafing!!!  Even the word grosses me out!!  I thought maybe they would be a bit higher or "lifted" but they aren't really. They actually look pretty normal with a bra on.  I know...TMI (too much information Laurie!)  I will post a nice pic of Mike and I when I can wear a regular bra in a decent shirt so everyone can actually see that I am not Frankenstein!!  Oh and my port is GONE!!   Hallelujah!!!!

Surgery Day

In about a half hour Mike and I will be leaving to go check in at the hospital for my out-patient surgery.  We came into work to tie up a few loose ends since I will be gone a couple days (and so I don't eat and snack at home!!! I have to fast right now...boo!)  I am a bit nervous.  Today I will get my expander out and my new silicone implant put in...size C (ahhhh just the right size for me!) and then I will get my other breast fixed since it never really healed right.  He is going to cut some skin out and make it look all snazzy.  I hope he does cuz it looks yucky right now.  I am sure that part will hurt and will continue to hurt/heal the most.  Then lastly, I get my port out which is where they put the chemo to my veins.  I am sure that will hurt also as it is still a bit sensitive.  3 incisions to heal from, hopefully it goes fast and I can get some narcotic nap time!!  See you in a few days!

Nice Long Weekend....ahhhhhh

It was a nice relaxing weekend.  Hadley and I spent time playing for most of it.  She is quite an entertainer!!!  Some of the things that come out of her mouth are so much like me!!  Scary!!!  I am trying to get as much of holding her as I can, as I cannot lift her for 4 whole weeks after surgery!!!  I am so bummed.  Palmer the sweetheart that he is said he would help out with it.  And she loves her big bro Palmer!!! 

Palmer has his first football game on Sunday the 9th.  I hope I am feeling ok to go to it and sit.  I hate missing his games.  He also has his first dance on Friday.  I am officially a mom that has a son that is going to a real school dance.  Wow!!!! (Even though all of my friends from high school have children that have gotten married, or are going off to college this year, or getting their senior pics taken!!  I had my kids a bit later in life!!!)

Tomorrow is surgery and I am a bit nervous, but just more ready to get everything over with and healed up.  That would put me at "finished" and I can cross everything off my list that I needed to do for breast cancer.  Ahhhhhhh! (oh except maybe the nipple tattoo, if I decide to have it!)